In my previous post, I explored some negative undertones that can come served alongside our favorite comfort foods. If you haven’t read it yet, I suggest you start here: Am I an Emotional Eater?
Before we dive into the questions I presented in the above article I want to share with you three needs, or emotional gaps, that I frequently fill with comfort foods.
As you read I encourage you to pay attention and notice if any of these themes show up for you. Write down, or reflect on, what you notice with kindness and awareness not hurtful judgment.
Remember, we are worthy of comfort.
Nostalgia—
When I am stressed, anxious, or emotionally zapped it can feel good to reminisce about a time that once was. I may recall pleasant memories of feeling cared for when my mother took extra care to celebrate me with a bowl of homemade spaghetti or offered me ice cream after she patched up a skinned knee. I may not remember what made me fall, but my body recalls the emotion, and I am soothed by a sense of connection that comes to mind when I consume these foods.
Nostalgia is a potent element of home cooking. One that can inspire us with familiar scents, textures, and tradition. I see this present in my kitchen every time my husband cooks up a batch of Gumbo. As our home fills with the warm embrace of a simmering roux, he stirs and tells me stories about exploring New Orleans as a preteen resident. I am fully present. I can practically taste what it is like to be there. Until he realizes we are out of Crystal Hot Sauce and I am on a frantic trip to the store… because it is “just not the same” without it.
Convenience—
There are times in life when I just have nothing left to give. I may be maxed out from my workload, a confrontation, grief, climate change, or political affairs. Maybe my dog looked at me funny. Maybe my body hurts. Maybe I am just trying to get to bed on time.
Whatever the case may be, there will always be days when I don’t have the energy to figure out what to eat. Let alone what I should eat to stay in alignment with my goals. I just need it to be easy, satisfy my hunger, and require very little from me.
Physical Comfort—
These are the foods I reach for when I want to feel physically soothed. For me, this is typically a soup with a rich broth and some sort of delicious noodle. It nourishes me, I feel warm and cozy and like everything is going to be okay.
I find these same feelings present in a glass of red wine with dinner or an evening cup of tea. My shoulders relax and the day’s ruffled feathers mostly settle into place.
Could we notice our emotional need and respond to the gap with comfort food?
It takes practice, but leaning in and taking the time to notice an emotional need is a key to being able to respond to the need and not just react to it. If you notice that you are craving nostalgia, could you call a friend and talk about the good old days?
Sentimentality in our food can be a treasure chest full of history, but it can also work against you if you aspire to meet dietary or culinary goals that differ from your past. If this is the case I encourage you to reach out and ask about my strategies for creating purposed food nostalgia.
If you acknowledge that you will not always be at your best, could you prepare homemade convenience foods on high-energy days? Think Tamales, homemade by you, or a neighborhood vendor who is happy to stock your freezer. You may also consider prepping a zucchini lasagna, stuffing potstickers, prepping for crockpot dal, or freezing homemade soup. More to the point, if you know that convenience is your main emotional need could you just ask someone else to make dinner?
If you are able to notice that you need physical comfort, is a warm shower, cuddle, or hammock nap in order prior to a glass of wine? What peace could be achieved if you acknowledged the role emotions have in dictating your food choices?